My period arrived this morning. About 10mins before I was about to test. It mustve knew.
I stupidly got so excited this month. I was convinced. I ran to my friends car yesterday and had to hold my boobs to stop them hurting. That is NOT normal for me. Going in to the bath last night, they felt heavy and sore… It was a sure fire sign that I was pregnant.
It’s been 18months of non-stop trying and I really don’t know if I can keep going. Every month I hope and I pray that we’ve done it.. and it either doesn’t happen; or it happens and we lose it. That’s the only outcomes we’ve had.
I don’t know if I can keep doing this.. I want more than anything to be a mum, but the sinking/empty feeling I get when I get my hopes up is horrendous. I feel like such a failure.
Why is it so hard for me?