Appointment with the NHS

Appointment with the NHS

I’ve spoken briefly about my frustration with the NHS in relation to my miscarriages and I think I should be more specific. Its mainly at my local GP’S attitude and staff than aren’t directly involved with my history. And I tend to be constantly angry at the R.A.H hospital by how I was treated by them during my 1st miscarriage at 21. (See my post ‘guilt’ for more detail on that one)

I had my appointment at the Queen Elizabeth University Hospital  (Southern general – it’ll always be southern general to me)

Anyway.. the doctor and sister that seen me today were fantastic. I’d already met the sister when I was in for tests around 9months ago (9months,  how horrendously ironic). They were both so understanding and sympathetic.  I wasnt patronised or made to feel like it wasnt a big deal. They were genuine.  And while I cried at least 4 times, I left feeling better… feeling listened to.

I never had further tests done as everything that could be tested already has been. Everything is negative. Or positive. I dunno.. it’s a good result. I’m basically a picture of health. I’ve just been unlucky. Three times.
Part of me hoped there was something – at least that way it could be treated. But I was assured that medically speaking its better this way.

The advice was just to keep trying. Stay positive. Do everything I’m already doing. It’s hard to see the light sometimes but I am going to keep going. I’ve only been fighting for a year and I know some of you have been fighting much longer. Your strength helps me keep going.

If anyone is delaying the tests, or scared to go for fear of discovering something they didn’t want to know – just go. The worst is fear of the unknown. Once you have some kind of answer, you can start to move on. I’m still going to feel like shit every now and then, I’m still going to be angry and frustrated. I’ll 100% still cry. But I’ll know that there’s nothing more I can or could ever have done. I know that when it’s my time.. I’ll have my baby.

(At least that’s the positivity I’m trying to lead with today!)


9 thoughts on “Appointment with the NHS

  1. Honey I really don’t know what to think about this. On the one hand, I’m glad that you don’t have to have any more tests, or anything “wrong” that means more heartache and treatment. On the other hand, it’s great news that you’re fine but I know how shit “you’ve just been unlucky” is as a reason. I’m glad you’re finding the positivity, and I’m always hoping for you but I also understand the frustration of there not being a reason for why you’ve had to suffer this three times. I really really hope that you get your happy ending. In the meantime, just know that your strength and honesty is an inspiration to so many. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank u so much Cerian. I honestly don’t know what i would’ve done without the people I’ve spoken to through blogging – you included. It means so much having the support and more importantly, the understanding of people going/ who have went through it.

      I’ll just have to keep my fingers and toes crossed that next time will be my time. I literally can’t do anything more! 🙂 xxxxx

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I have had every test under the sun and was told there was no explanation for my four consecutive losses. It is frustrating! Yes, you don’t want anything to be terribly wrong but you also feel like something must be and you want answers. I tried several different things for this pregnancy (which so far has been more successful than the other four): acupuncture/Chinese herbs, vitamin supplements and reducing exposure to toxins based on Rebecca Fett’s advice in It Starts With the Egg, and progesterone suppositories (even though there was no medical indication that it was needed). Perhaps one of those could work for you? Hopefully this unsolicited advice doesn’t put you off but I’ve been where you are and I know how frustrating it is. I hope next time is your lucky one.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I desperately wanted progesterone and there was a UK study last year that has now been published but the consultant said the results didn’t really prove anything so she isn’t really pushing for that.

      I think I”ll definitely check out Rebecca Fetts advice if you recommend it. We will just never know if it’s something we do differently or if it’s just our luck and ur right.. it can be so frustrating!

      Thanks for the advice. .. I’m up for trying absolutely anything next time round!! 🙂 xx


      1. My first specialist refused to give me progesterone for the same reasons but my second specialist said it couldn’t hurt so why not. I did read a similar study (possibly the same one) and I think the rate of success was 64% in the progesterone group compared to 61% in the control group so yes, not a major difference but maybe for that 3% it was the difference! We’ve already proven to be in the 1% by having so many consecutive losses. Does that all make sense? Not the most scientific reasoning on my part but if it can’t hurt why not try it? And don’t think of it as you did something different or wrong and that’s why you didn’t stay pregnant but other women do. If Rebecca Fett is on the right track it could just be that we are more susceptible to environmental factors than other women but we can fight that by reducing our exposure and taking supplements that help repair the damage. And there have been studies that show acupuncture can improve IVF success rates so there’s no reason to think it couldn’t impact recurrent miscarriage as well. I know it’s a lot to try and get into all at once but I feel like, if the doctors haven’t been able to give you any answers, then they’re all worth a shot. But of course do your own investigating and see what you think. I just couldn’t keep trying the same thing and getting the same results. It was making me crazy. I had to try something different.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I totally see where you’re coming from. .you have no idea how much I appreciate the advice!! I’m at the stage now where as long as it won’t hurt me, I’ll try it!

        My husband is still wanting to push the progesterone. He’s prob read more than I have actually and he wants me to demand it, so I may still ask for it when the time comes.

        I think I used to focus more on finding info about what NOT to do in order to prevent miscarriages and what causes them as opposed to reading about what TO do. I think acupuncture would at the least de-stress me which HAS to be good!!

        Thank you so so much again for all your advice!!


        Liked by 1 person

  3. Thank you for allowing me to find you. I will be thinking of you as you start trying again. I too am 29 and suffer from miscarriages but i need 1 more consecutive MC to medically fall in to the “recurrent” group. It’s a truely tragic experience to have to go through once, let alone multiple times. The good news is with nothing apparently wrong you are more likely to have a successful pregnancy next time than another miscarriage. Lets hope 2016 is our year. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for commenting! I really sympathize with u and hope u never do fall in to that category!
      I think its ridiculous that you can’t really get help until you’ve had 3 or more.. (although I did get tests after my 2nd but only cos I was 11plus weeks) . But for most women, it’s horrible they have to go through it over and over again before medical professionals take notice!

      I’m sorry for both your losses and I hope this year brings you good news!


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